Being 14 is not easy; you are always worried if your hair is too frizzy, what you should wear, when will you experience your first kiss and will you ever fell in love?
When I was 14, I thought of all those things and some more like where is the best place to sit on the bus in order to survive a terror attack? If I’ll sit in the back of the bus the explosion will be the most powerful because of the engine. If I’ll sit in the middle I will for sure get hurt – if the bomber is at the entrance of the bus or in the back. If I’ll sit at the entrance of the bus driver will suspect the bomber, he will explode at the same second.
When I was 14, there was a terrorist attack almost every day in Jerusalem, my home town. This situation was familiar to the people who lived in Jerusalem during the Second Intifada. Everyday, my chest would tighten every time I got on a bus, after I was on the bus I was busy looking around trying to see if anyone looks suspicious.
There was only one place my parents let me go out to on my own, to the mall. They assumed it was safe because there’s a security guard at the entrance. At the beginning, I thought it was awful, the mall felt like a prison. I started to understand my parents after the ice cream parlor, where I used to hang out with my friends, got bombed and some of my friends got injured.
My most meaningful memory was when one of my classmate’s mother was murdered. My friend was suppose to meet her mom and she just waited and waited until she found out there was no reason to wait anymore. It made me think about my mother and how much I love her, (although she can be very (!) annoying), and what I would do if all of a sudden I wouldn’t have her in my life. That broke and actually still is breaking my heart. My classmate won’t have her mother there to shield and protect her, she won’t have her in her wedding and her mom will never see her grandchildren.
I had friends that died, I have friends that were injured, I have friends that witnessed horrible murder scenes. This didn’t happen only me, there are a lot of the people that died in terrorist attacks in Israel. Obviously, the Palestinians didn’t have it better and 1800 civilians were murdered. Peopled on both sides suffered for years from this terrible reality. Four years of living scared, with sorrow and despair and with one giant but maybe naïve question (well, I was only 14) – Why? For what? For which purpose?